Gratitude and apprieciation is a life force

How appreciative are you of what you have right now?
Sometimes it is easy to stop noticing the small miracles around us all the time.
Gratitude is the door through which life pours, being grateful and appreciative is a choice, a choice to open yourself up to seeing the world afresh every minute.

Do you use the word 'if' or 'when' in the way you look at your life? for example
if I had more money
if I was married/ had a boyfriend/ wasn't in a relationship...
if my mother/ father hadn't.....
if I had not been bullied/ changed schools /suffered........................
or
when I get sorted
when I get a promotion
when I go away
when I have time- if I had more time......................
you get the picture - you are looking at life from the perspective of a victim.

Bad things happen but wishing things were otherwise or blaming someone or something for the situation you dislike is only giving you permission to stay helpless and a victim to circumstances- it is also a way of not talking responsibility for creating your own life.

New things come into your life when you see things with gratitude. 

What are you grateful for learning and what gave you the opportunity to learn this? what are you most grateful for right now? How many things could you appreciate more if you stopped worrying for a moment?

One way to start appreciating and developing a grateful outlook is to become mindful. Just stop for three minutes and be aware of what your body is doing. Your heart is beating in a way that is able to pump your blood hard enough to gather oxygen, hormones, vitamins and minerals and then push them to all your body cells appropriately - even to the end of your toes and then have enough power to return to the heart. You are breathing life sustaining oxygen in an equally and integrated way and you are able to be aware of this cognitively- WOW! I am aware I sound annoying but a living body really is technologically beautiful, a stunningly designed self sustaining system ...........
-and you are both creator and user- you choose and create many of the apps. How much stress hormone your body creates depends on how you think!

Keeping a gratitude journal is a great way to feel better about your life or just noting before you fall aleep what you apprieciate about the day, and why.

I love this  - funny and spot on!  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8LaT5Iiwo4

Emmons R.A. and McCullough M.E. (2003). Counting Blessings versus Burdens: An experimental investigation of gratitude and subjective well-being in daily life. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(2), 377-89

Happiness and a growth mindset

Research is showing that having a growth mindset rather than being fixed in how we see the world is an important distinction between people who thrive and those who don’t.

 

People with a growth mindset never stop learning. Your ability to adapt and learn is a key component of your happiness and well-being. We all face challenges and change, and having an attitude that embraces personal growth happens when we are willing to learn. Setbacks and failure are opportunities to improve and grow.

People with a growth mindset love challenges and new experiences.

In her book, Mindset: The new psychology of success, Carol Dweck explains how having an open mind to both our abilities and the world we live in allows us to grow and develop, and that holding fixed ideas reduces and limits not only our potential, but our potential for happiness. She also says that as a culture we don’t praise enough the effort and struggle people make, especially the young, when facing and overcoming setbacks.

‘Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.’ Albert Einstein,1879–1955

According to Carol Dweck

People with a Growth Mindset:

• Are open to new ideas.
• Are always learning (especially from setbacks).
• Enjoy challenges.
• Believe that abilities develop.
• Believe that lives and relationships and other people develop.
• Work at relationships

People with a Fixed Mindset

• Believe that ability and intelligence are innate.
• Are Judgemental.
• Limit achievement (crumbles in the face of challenge and adversity).
• Believe that if relationships need work they must be wrong.      
• Believe that that if they have to work at things they must be stupid – it should come naturally

Research has shown that people with a growth mindset are more likely to be realistic about themselves and their abilities than those with a fixed mindset. Being open to growth, learning and  development does not mean an over-inflated idea of one’s abilities, but openness to possibilities and potential.

 

How open to change and development are you?

 

Think of a time or incident that was hard for you.  

What did you learn?

 

How did you change?

 

What in your life has changed for the better because of this?

 

What, about the experience, are you grateful for?

With a growth mindset we grow intellectually (growing in our knowledge of the world and developing our reasoning powers) and emotionally (growing more emotional intelligence). All experience becomes good as it builds resources and self knowledge for positive growth and change.  The more we know about ourselves the greater are our chances of realising our potential

Find your mindset

Read the statements below and mark whether you agree or disagree with them:

 

1. You are the person you are and you can’t really change that, or

 

2. I believe that everybody can change, every kind of person is able to change.

 

3. The main part of who you are can’t change but you can do things differently, or

4 .You can always change basic things about the kind of person you are.

 

*[Questions 1 and 3 are the fixed mindset questions and 2 and 4 are the growth mindset.]

 

If you are most comfortable with statements 1 and 3, try thinking about what it means to you to believe that people cannot change, and, more importantly, what would change in your life if you chose statements 2 and 4. Then: Make a quick list of where you have opportunities to learn more.

 Carol Dweck (2006). Mindset: The new psychology of success. New York: Ballantine Books